Frikking Cable!

Frikking cable! I was watching "Changing Lanes" and it was just getting to the good part!! It's not all the time that I get to watch good movies in cable..let alone two in a row! At least I was able to finish "She's The One". But what I was really looking forward to see was "Changing Lanes"! I haven't seen that movie! Grrr...

Hayy life. Sometimes you're up, sometimes you're down. And I'm..down I guess. But pretty soon I'll be up again...

This morning, I went to school with my carpoolmates. We were to meet at the terminal at 8:30am for our 9:40am class. At around 8:40, Misha's car finally came but some people still weren't there so we had to wait. It was almost 9am when Kevin came. Well, he's kind of a newbie and a lot of people find him weird. He's okay really, but there's just something about him that's kind of irritating. But I'm cool with him. His girlfriend's a friend of Zaza's and mine too. So there. Anyway, I was kinda pissed while waiting because I had a frikking accounting test and of course, I didn't wanna be late. When he got out of his car, he was kinda running towards us and he's in black. Well, no big deal with that, but he's soo white and his black shirt just caught my attention. He opened the door and I noticed his eyes were puffy, then he quickly explained that someone died. Okay. So I felt kinda guilty for hating him for his tardiness and it just all dissolved when he said his situation. All of us in the van didn't really know what to say so there was an awkward silence. Nicole finally asked if he's okay. For the rest of the ride, I tried to review for my test but can't help but think about him. I kept looking at him and he seems really bothered and sad.

Going home, we were in the same shift again. He loosened up a bit and he has managed to smile. I was tired so I was sleeping the whole ride. After dropping Baffee to the terminal, there were only two of us in the car and he asked me if I have ever experienced sudden loss. Well I did, but I guess I'm lucky because I've never experienced a loved one to die. That's my initial reaction. When our house got burned down, I was really devastated and that was my lowest but I don't think that loss would come close to losing someone. But he was right when he said that a part of me died. Yes, a part of me died. I mean c'mon! That house was where I grew up! All the birthdays, Christmas parties and reunions were all done there. I used to run around naked in that house! I even remember the weekends when Dad would trim the endless grass in our garden and we'd follow him around so when he needs a glass of cold water, we'll be there. So anyway..he's absolutely right. A part of me was taken away with that loss and that's what he's going through right now. It's kinda difficult for me to give him comfort because I really don't know him. All I know is just this white guy who dates a friend and I ride with him going to school on Tuesdays. I told him that after what happened to me, I didn't want to think about it. Then he said that the first thing is denial. But I told him that I never went through that stage. I mean when things like that happen, you know right then and there that that's reality and denial couldn't take place. This is me talking. I'm sure it's not the same for everyone, but for me, I was able to accept it easily but dealing with the loss was difficult. I know it will be harder for him since it's someone very close to him. Well...as Dad said..there are 3 things in life that you can't avoid. That's 1. Change. 2. Death and 3. Taxes.

Almost 3 years has passed and I can still remember that night perfectly. I've written about a dozen of papers about that night but it never gets old. Maybe it never will...

Okay..the story..maybe tomorrow..I'm kinda tired.. *cough*