Blab Blob Blog

I'm home alone and can't think of anything to do. How pathetic. Here I go again, pondering on my existence... I actually don't like the idea that this blab blob blog is open to everyone. Only my closest friends know about this and I'm pretty sure they don't even go here. Hayyy...
I like reading Ikay's blog. She's very positive. She's totally in love with this guy who unfortunately, doesn't reciprocate her feelings but I feel that she's really lucky to be feeling what she's feeling right now. I believe that love is not a two-way thing. It's one way because when you love someone, you love that person with you whole heart and don't expect anything in return. She really is feeling love. I'm too selfish I think to be able to feel that. I can never love someone who won't love me back..I think.

Pondering, pondering. I have my Market1 class now and I'm having a good time. The teacher's really cool. Well anyway, he said to us that a person's attitude could only be 1. Positive or 2. Negative. Obviously, Ikay has that positive attitude. And I have the latter. It's actually a choice, if you want to enjoy life or reflect on it's deeper aspects and think about your problems. That's just sooo me. I can't help but see myself as the woman version of the character Hugh Grant plays in About A Boy. A "superficial loser"..and "I'm really this shallow." I mean that's negative attitude right there.

I am bored..and I'm alive. How sad!!! Damn! There I go again. I think I heard somewhere that it's a choice to feel bored. So...I choose this?! Who would wanna be bored?! Well yeah..instead of wasting my time right here maybe I could do something else? Like what?! Watch TV??? Well..that's boring too..but what the heck...Aryt..I'll go watch Big Fish again...
Before I do...Hmm..Big Fish! This has got to be one of the best films ever. I watched this with my family and I tried pulling back my tears. I am so afraid to talk to my parents about the shit hole I'm in right now and I didn't want to end up like the father and son in the film. They didn't talk for 3 years. 3 fucking years...

Godwinks

I was in my room just a while ago and I saw the book Zaza's friends asked her to read. Godwinks at Love. Written there was the definition of 'godwink'. It says there that it's a signal from the universe or some sort of superior power... or something to that effect. I read the first few pages. It talks about coincidences and how they are not coincidences at all like it wasn't a coincidence that I was reading that book. It actually caught me. Being the romantic that I am, waiting for that fairy tale story of mine that should be happening to me that has not yet even started yet, the book was like talking to me. It says there that my fairy tale is bound to happen soon that life is just like a jigsaw puzzle. We just need to have the patience..blah blah blah. I closed the book. Surprisingly, I'm not that interested about my love life. Except it made me thinking for a few seconds about it. (When I went to the gym this morning, there was this cute guy and we were looking at each other but pretending not to look. Haha!) I shook the thought out of my head. I'm not really concerened about that now.

What I really want to know is if God gave me those godwinks. For almost two years now, I've been in search of myself. I'm not really sure but am I having an identity crisis? For sure I know me. But just like anyone else, there are still some things that makes me question myself. Maybe I just don't know what I want. I'm not sure about that either. I know exactly what I want and that is to be happy and to be content. At this point in my life, I'm not happy and I'm not content. I want to make something out of myself. My life doesn't seem to have a direction. For goodness' sake, I'm in my junior year in college and I do not really have a course yet! For sure He knows I want to take up film but He said not now..or maybe it was a NO or NEVER. Then I thought He told me to take up Marketing but heck, I didn't pass the frikking test! So where am I to go? Is that how He really intended things to happen? For me to end up in this crossroads? Really ironic for me who's been really good in directing and giving my friends advice. Who am I to give directions and advice?!

I've had my doubts on God. I haven't been talking to Him for quite a long time now. I mean, I really don't know what to say. Do I say thank you? My life's a mess and I can't really thank Him for that. Coming from a very conservative exclusive school, I was taught that everything's possible with God. I believed that. I also tried to believe that the problem is me. That since I am questioning Him, He's giving me a hard time. Someone told me that when you pray, God gives only four answers. No, Yes, Maybe, Not now. So I have to be patient, right? But it seems like all the answers to my prayers are NO. I even think He means NEVER. So I stopped praying. It made me feel like I'm only talking to myself. So where are these godwinks?!
So it seems like God only has one purpose in my life. I blame Him when everything's screwed up. He's like my punching bag. But sometimes I find myself asking Him to help me. Funny thing is, everything seemed to have worked well for me for the past two months. I was at peace this summer vacation, thankfully. I never broke the news to my parents about me failing the Marketing test. I've been itching to tell them but I don't know how and when I'd do it. Another waterworks on the way. That's what I hate about having too much fun. A friend told me that after too much fun is tears. I'm done crying. Or am I? It's only about to begin.

Godwinks... I don't think God winked at me. Maybe I refuse to see it and I don't want to accept it. Maybe I misinterpreted it as something else. He has a plan for everyone...and this is the way He planned my life. That's the safest answer, isn't it? So for every failure a person has, it's not her fault. It was planned. Right. But as much as we want to think that we are in control and that we make our own lives, for every failure we make, it's because of our mistakes and stupidity. Now that's difficult. In a person's lifetime, he would make millions of mistakes. I would have gone insane blaming myself for all the mistakes I've done. That's when godwinks appear. There are godwinks because we are in control and He's just giving us signals to give us a hint on where to go next. But I don't see those frikking godwinks!!! Where are they and why don't they come up when I need them?! I need them now and I need them fast. I need divine intervention. There's a lot to life that I want to experience but I feel so frikking boxed up. I feel like I'm missing on so many things. It's like I've become numb already. I want to do a lot of things but I feel that I need to fix my life first. I need directions to show me what's next. I need godwinks...really bad.

Inner Angst

When we were in Caliraya Ida said something to me that made me confuse about myself more. She heard me talking in my sleep. I woke her up actually in the middle of the night because of my sleep talking. I asked her what I was saying and she said she couldn't really understand but from the tone of my voice I sounded really mad and all she could hear was "Damn it! Damn it!"

I'm a very happy person. Well who am I kidding?! Things could be a lot better but generally, everything's okay. I've always believed that dreams have meanings and it could be saying what's in my subconscious. I've never tried having my dreams interpreted or anything but I just know they mean something. And me saying "Damn it! Damn it" and mumbling a lot of things with rage tells me I have to let something out. But I really don't know what it is. At that particular point, I was having a good time. I mean, I'm with my friends on vacation. What could possibly make me angry?

The Caliraya trip has been weeks ago but that sleep talking shit is still troubling me. I've done a lot of sleep-talking before. But I hear it's all about silly things. Like aliens. Gawwddd.. I dreamed that there was an alien in our room. Hehe. That was funny and it scared the hell out of my sister. And the other time was when I ate too much. That was years ago. My brother's birthday. Our van was new and new cars have this certain smell. I ate too much that I got dizzy or something..in my sleep I said "Huwag! Huwag kang sasakay jan! Mahihilo ka jan!" Hehehe..another good one. So I only have 3 stories about my sleep talking. Since I had my own room for a few years, maybe no one's heard me talk then. Now that I'm sharing a room with my sister..maybe she didn't hear the other times. Or maybe I haven't been talking in my sleep! The dream-catcher works! Hehe..

Summer Vacation '04

Oh God it's Thursday already!!! I can't believe this. On Monday I'll go back to school and "learn"... whatever that means. It's not that I don't like school. I like going to school..at times. It's just that this summer's been great. That's an overstatement I guess. Well, I've been going to a lot of places with my friends and it's amazing. Actually going to beaches with my friends and family are the only thing great about this summer. And probably the national elections. (Hello..I'm a first time voter. I was excited). Other than that, I've practically seen all the TV shows there is on the planet. Everyday's a routine for me. And it's really boring. Really boring. I don't even get to dress up or anything anymore. Actually, there's really nothing to do. As usual, I've planned ahead: driving, tennis, and summerjob. Haha. That was my plan last year too! Hahaha. Except for the summerjob. I just wanna have my own money since my parents are never giving me money anymore and since there's no school, I don't have my daily allowance. Well Ida suggested this summer job in Caliraya. The summer camp for kids. Which is great actually. P500/day. Not bad at all. It's like you get paid to have a vacation. I really don't know why I didn't do it. Maybe I just didn't like Tita Estee so much. She's the wife of the owner of the island. When we went there for vacation, I really didn't have a very good vibe with her. I dunno what exactly..but I just didn't like the idea of working for her. And Ida didn't call me about it! Well it was stupid of me. I mean it's not like I'd be around Tita Estee all the time, right? Tita Vicky, Ida's mom will be there and Ida will be there! Bad idea. I should have called her or something. If I did, I'd have 3000 bucks by now. Really stupid of me.

I really hate this feeling. Damn it! It's like there's this timebomb that I just want to stop but can't. I don't wanna go to school yet! For the reason that I really do not have a course yet..and my parent's are not aware of it. My course is originally Economics-Accounting. Double degree. Amazing, huh? Well that's what everybody thinks. But I don't. Taking that course was like hanging my self. When I was really young, I wanted to be this bigtime lawyer making lotsa money. In high school, I felt like it wasn't for me. I tried out for the debating team and I sucked. Really sucked. I wasn't accepted. That was like the first stab for me. And then from there, I was beginning to question if I really wanted to be a lawyer. But everyone around me was like expecting me to be one. From my parents to my grandparents to my tito's and tita's. Heck even my parents' friends. So I sort of tried to convince myself that that's what I was born to become. And everyone's even telling me that being a lawyer suits me perfectly since I'm always arguing, I'm a good speaker and all that crap. The more that I heard my friends and family say that to me, I guess I was blinded in a way. But saying a speech in front of many people didn't thrill me at all. Debating is cool but it didn't excite me the way directing excited me. I've directed all the plays back in high school and they all rocked. I swear. All my classmates could say that. Acting is cool too but directing was way better. Telling clueless people what to do is really fun and I saw sense in motivating people to go out in the stage and conquer their fear. I mean everyone gets stage fright. Everyone! The stage is a wonderful place to be. I've seen shy people and I mean really shy people and once I bring that inner craziness in them..or I just intimidate them too much that they had to act or else..hehe... Well the stage is the place to be really. Once you're there, just do what you have to do, say the line you have to say and everything will fall into place..the lights, the music and then just wait for the applause. Well my life's been a stage I guess...I've been doing what's been told of me. But in the middle of my line, I screwed up and the lights didn't turn out right, the music got too loud and I hear no applause. BUT! The curtains are up, I'm still on stage and I still have the chance to redeem myself..I guess we'll see. At this point..I still don't know what to do.

So I've been trying to get out of my course. It's really hard for me. I'm a huge disappointment to my parents since they're expecting so much from me and I've been letting them down really. But continuing with my course will just disappoint them more. I mean I suck at accounting and math..why the hell did I take up that freaking course! So I tried shifting to Marketing. I feel that it suits me more. But I was fucking rejected. I took the test and I didn't make it to the required grade..I think by 2 points. Shit. And I haven't told my parents. I'm so delayed. Zaza would even graduate before I do. My life is just a mess right now. Well as of now..not yet..since I'm on vacation. And I know perfectly well that when I go back to school and I'd file my shifting application, I'll be doomed. So fucking doomed.

But I'm trying not to think about that yet. This summer, I've gone to Bohol, Caliraya and Subic. On Saturday, my family and I are going to Kalatagan. And I'll go surfing! Oh yes. Surfing is one of my dreams. I want to be sporty and I want an extreme sport and surfing's exactly what I want. I just love the beach. Snorkelling and seeing that world is just fascinating. I've actually seen Nemo and Marlyn. In Bohol. I swear I saw 2 clown fishes hiding in this huge coral. One's big and the other one's small. Perfect. It's Nemo and Marlyn. I also saw the "deep blue sea". That's what Dad called it. The big blue. It's really scary. When I saw it, I just panicked. You can't see the bottom of the ocean. It's all blue. I imagined all sorts of things like sharks, killer whales. And the scariest part is that the current is dragging you to that part. My favorite part in the Bohol trip is when we went boating. It was dawn. We woke up at 5am. The sun hasn't risen yet and the sea was so calm. Looking at the horizon it was like nothing was dividing the sky from the water. What's so amazing was that in the east, the sun was beginning to rise but in the west, the moon was still up in the sky. Wow. That time, I told myself what a stupid person I was doubting God for all the shit that happened to me. It was such a beautiful and peaceful sight and it just sort of hit me right in the head. Then we saw dolphins. Wild dolphins! Wow. I was literally jumping for joy.

Summer vacation's also a time for me to read. Well I've been such a bum that I read only 2 books. The Da Vinci Code by Dan Brown and Can You Keep a Secret by Sophie Kinsella. Both are fun books to read. The Da Vinci Code is just amazing. Once you start reading it, you get hooked immediately. And I've learn a lot too. I mean it wasn't God that I was doubting. It was the Catholic Church. Reading TDVC had a huge impact on me and I prefer to believe what it says there than what te Catholic Church has been teaching me for 19 years. It was filled with so many mysteries and action. I found myself trying to solve the puzzles in it and I got a few right answers! Really nice. Can You Keep A Secret on the other hand, is one of those romantic novels I like to read. It makes me feel hopeful at the same time sorry for myself. Hehe. But I just love British humor. It's very light, no brainer but really entertaining.

Looking back at Summer Vacation '04...it was a good break. I had a good time hanging out with the goddesses, spending time with my family and thinking about a lot of things. It may not seem like it, but I've done a lot of thinking. Really. I started to write this story. For some reason I was inspired to start the story that I'd be making for my first film. Haha. I like that. My first feature film. It's a story about a girl. Maybe it's about me and my pathetic life. I'm actually thinking of making a series. The Dawson's Creek type..but it's not about exchaning boyfriends, sex or anything like that. About teenage life that I'm soon to leave. (Wow...in less than 8 months, I'd be 20!). With a different story. I'm just so tired of those stories. But then again, I'm not a very good writer. Maybe this will just be one of those plans I have like the driving and tennis lessons I've been trying to have since last year. Hehe..

Surf Chic...RIIIIGGHHHTTT!

I just got home from Subic/Olongapo. I had a great time as usual. We went to the beach..Marga's place. Another house worthy of being in the lifestyle magazines. Vain people that we are, we took pictures of ourselves. Well, I took a lot of things with me. Memories (drama!) and that trip definitely left its mark. I injured myself. Marga and I are "surf chics" even if we dunno how to surf...yet. Well I will by next week! Hehe..so anyway..she has these wakeboards (my sister told me that's what you call that thingie). I got into the water. The water's not even deep yet I've done the most stupid thing...I tried to sit on top of the board that I didn't see the huge wave that was about to hit me. The next thing I knew, I'm on my ass with blood from my right arm. I injured myself. Too much for being a surf chic.

Caliraya II, Blah, Goddesses, One Of the Boys, Someday

CALIRAYA II

Well for the last part of Caliraya...we just went to the camp again then after that..we went home.
Man..the ride home was just hell. I ate too much and maybe the long drive home didn't help. I felt really dizzy. Good thing there were plastic bags around. I threw up. I hate that feeling..and the smell. Hehe.. well I gagged twice and then I felt a little better. Then I got home..and that's the second part. Haha. I'm just really not up to narrate the story detail by detail like I did the first part.

BLAH

Well anyway..my vacation's almost over. Well I think I got two weeks left. I haven't enrolled yet. Typical of me. I don't even know when I'm supposed to enrol. I think I lost my EAF. Oh well.. I'll look for it maybe later..if I remember that I have to find it.
I was watching The Hunchback of Notredam just before I logged in. Well I argued with my mom as usual because she was gonna watch her frikking soap operas. I was in their room using their TV because the TV in the I don't know what to call that room..TV room I guess..well it's fucked up because sometimes there are no sounds coming out. Sheesh. Flat TV pa naman. As usual I forfeit. Hello..she's my mom! I just walked out. Not quietly of course. I dunno. But my mom just pisses me off so easily. Now this is funny. Mother's Day is on Sunday and right now I'm really mad at my mom because of the simple TV. Hmm.. I've been thinking of giving her a letter so I could explain and apologize for being such a bad daughter. That even despite all my actions I love her and no one could ever replace her in my heart (AWW...is this really me?!). But really..I'm just not used to that. I swear. I've had this New Year's resolution years ago that I'd say "I love you" to my family..but it's just not...me..or US. I mean, my family's really weird. Sometime's I really hate my family for not being supportive of me..but I'd never trade these people. We all have strong personalities and most of the time..we just clash.

Well..as usual...I'm not giving her that letter. One time I remember doing a portrait of her..when I was really young for her birthday. I really worked hard to do it..and it looked exactly like her! But I didn't give it to her. I recall going to my room and looking at the picture I drew. I was just about to give it to her but my siblings didn't have anything to give to her. What we usually do is that someone would buy something and it'll all come from us. But I couldn't possibly write in there that it came from all of us because I made that! So when I looked at it..I felt guilty that my siblings have nothing to give to her..and while looking at it..I saw that the eyes were not symmetrical. And I draw eyes all the time. I doodle eyes every where. But I just saw that it wasn't symmetrical. So I just crumpled my artwork and fed it to the trash can.

So I guess Mother's Day..Ate Erin will have a present..she has money! And she'd put our names in it and she'd collect money from us. We'll watch a movie, eat out like we usually do on Sundays.

GODDESSES

Going back to the story. If you don't know yet. I'm Esmeralda. Haha! My friends labeled me that. FYI...my friends and I are very conceited people. We call ourselves goddesses. Well I mean..it's true!!! All of us look like Disney goddesses! Gawwdd..it's sounds silly. I'm Esmeralda because of the dark skin and the colorful life she has. Damn..the theme for my 18th birthday was even bohemian. Anyway.. Abby's Princess Jasmine cos they both have these thick brows, dark eyes, long hair and according to her she's morena. Yeah right! So what does that make me?! Haha. She's morena because everyone in her family's mestizo and mestiza. Then.. Ida's Pocahontas. She has the long hair..or used to and the chinky eyes with the angular face and she's morena. Then Therine is..well it used to be Snow White because she has really white skin and black hair. But I told her Cinderella's more appropriate because for me, Cinderella's prettier..I mean same features..except for the hair..and she left her glass slipper, right? Well Therine's a little clumsy. A little! And back in high school leaving her shoe behind is normal. Hehe. Toni on the other hand used to be Belle. For the features, they're not really the same..but she used to have this beast following her around. Haha. But I told her that she should be the goddess from Hercules. I dunno the name but she's prettier than Belle..and must I say sexier. Well Toni's really sexy. And she has her Hercules! And Marga's Ariel the mermaid! Not because she has the fishtail. She's a good swimmer. Well I dunno if they noticed this but both of them has big pretty eyes. And Karla. She's Aurora. Simply because she's asleep all the time. I mean 15 minute car ride and she'll fall asleep. Haha. I think that's the only thing they have in common. Karla's really sporty and not very feminine as compared to the very demure Aurora. Well that's the history of the goddess thing. I dunno if people can stand us if we're all together. Haha. Maybe people would just get sick of us talking of how perfect we all are. Funny thing is...perfect as we are..only 2 of us have boyfriends and I think only 2 more have their love lives activated. And as expected..I'm not any of those 4 people.

ONE OF THE BOYS

And why is that you ask?! People around me tell me alll the time that I'm just intimidating. Well maybe I am. Okay, I am. "Lalapit pa lang ung guy eh pinapaalis mo na!" I have that attitude daw. (Even Zaza's friends are scared of me. Sheesh. I don't bite!) In my block actually I know that some guys are kinda intimidated. I just happen to say what's on my mind and I don't give a shit if they'd like it or not. And I say it straight. Parang target. I have guy friends. I'm with them all the time actually, especially last term. It was okay. I mean it was fun. But I'm treated as one of the boys. Man! They talk about girls, sex, body-building shit, sex, porn, girls...holy shit! I've given a few of them lectures actually on how they should treat women. They talk about women a lot and I don't like what I hear. Well I guess that's guy talk. And when they realize I'm there with them they'd go "Ah! Si Edel naman yan eh! One of the boys." Great. Well it's okay. It's like going to the other side of the fence. I hear what they gotta say. So I pretty much know how guys think. With that experience.. I've concluded that I'll never meet a boy for me in DLSU. I know it's "hasty generalization" but I really do feel I won't meet a boy I like in there. I have these frikking standards too! I told my friends I've dropped these standards..but I guess I really haven't. And I've watched way too many romantic comedies and read as many romance novels. I wanna have that spark and that from-the-moment-i-saw-you-i-knew shit. Haha. Too ideal my friends said..but hello! Love should be ideal! Besides, I've waited too long and I've stopped waiting. If it comes, it comes.

SOMEDAY...

"It will come...someday." I was just talking to Kathy and she was sharing her date with this guy she really doesn't like. I was really happy for her. It was her first date! Of course I'm happy for her. The guy seems okay. She said he's cute but he keeps texting her stuff like he's tired, he's wasted. Well obviously the guy wants her to say something sweet or something mushy and Kathy's just not like that...so I told her to call him "DUDE" or "PARE" and for sure the guy will get the message and that's what I call all the guys I know. Haha. And she said "Hayy nako..tatanda ka ng dalaga niyan! Di bale kunin kitang Ninang ng anak ko." That wasn't very nice. Funny though. So my reply was "It will come someday...20 years from now." Haha. Well I never want to be that matandang dalaga! I'm beautiful! I wanna have children who'll be as beautiful as me! Haha. I've never pictured myself as an old maid! NOOOO!!! Haha. When my Titas ask if I have a boyfriend, they're like disappointed that I don't have one yet. I know for sure Zaza's gonna have one before I do. (It's really ironic because she once told me that she thought that I'd get a boyfriend first before Ate Erin..hehe..EEE!!! Wrong!). I have a Lola..she's an old maid and they told me I might end up like her...oh no! That's a nightmare! Hehe. I just laugh at the thought. I mean I'm only 19! Only is appropriate..right? Of course it is! I have my whole life ahead of me. I'll meet him...SOMEDAY. ;) I just hope he's artistic..a rockstar would do...with a really good sense of humor..of course who smells really good..has a beautiful mind (not like the guy from A Beautiful Mind!), who'd drive ME out of MY mind and I'd drive HIM out of HIS mind! With beautiful eyes...and a really nice body..well I don't really like guys with "muskles". Haha! For some reason I like thin guys...not payatot! Perfect teeth...Basta.. Someone who'd write me a song or paint me. He can carry deep conversations...and non-sense talks shempre...who's really extreme...who'd go bungee jumping...and... I dunno...he has to be perfect for me I guess. Simple as that. Now a perfect guy is different from a guy who's perfect for me. Basta someone who'll sweep me off my feet. Hayyy....SOMEDAY...but what's taking him so long?!

Caliraya Trip Part I

It's been a while...I have a really really really long story..so this is the first installment...
Last week, I was with my friends: Ida, Abby and Marga. We went to Caliraya (IDa's Mom has a friend who happens to be married to this rich Australian Economist and they own an island there). Anyway...the place was just beautiful. We arrived at around 8pm and we had to ride this boat. It was just a 3-minute ride. From the boat, I already saw some lights. Red and orange lights and I'm not really sure but there were like torches with fire in it and it just lit up the place. It was like we were going to the tribal council of Survivor (I'm a huge fan of the show). When we came, we were greeted by huge dogs. Ida brought with her Stussy, a big, black but really friendly dog. And I guess the other dogs, who happened to be Stussy's siblings and friends, heard her. So huge black dogs came in to greet us. I'm not a dog person at all so I was not really happy to see those 9 NINE dogs. But big as they were, they were harmless.
We entered this gazebo and it was the dining room. It was hard to appreciate it because it was dark but everything was made from wood and there was this really cute thing..I dunno what to call it but it was made of beads and some kind of bamboo thingies and it was softly lit by yellow lights. It was so eclectic. Really nice. Then we saw a turtle. Donatello. I dunno much about animals but it was a rare kind of turtle. Anyway..we came in to our room. It was like a nipa hut. It was okay...but what's really amazing about it is that it was open. Normally a room is enclosed to like 4 walls right? But that room only has 3 walls! So it's like a room and a veranda at the same time. It was overlooking the manmade lake and you could sleep stargazing..I've never seen anything like it. And the walls were painted mustard yellow. And there were cool wooden accents in it. But I was really happy to see the coolest bathroom I have ever seen in my entire life. Well..reading my story...it's very obvious that I am not very good at describing things, but I'll try my best. Hehe.. Okay so the bathroom had orange tiles in it. And everyone knows I love orange. But there were like divisions in it. When you enter, first thing you'll see is the sink and the huge mirror (and for vain people like me, that's good). But when you see the floor, you'll see rocks, around the tiles of the "sink place". And to the left is the shower. There's this divider wall which was only around 5x5 feet. The same idea with the "sink place", there are rocks before the divider. What I like about the shower place is that it overlooks the lake. So when you're taking a shower, you're seen from the outside...something like that but of course you're not (I THINK!). And to the left of the sink is the nice toilet. Same idea for that. Another cool thing is that there's this falls. The wall is stone gray that has water falling from it...and of course there's this small pool where the water falls (does that make sense?) and anytime the dogs feel thirsty, they could have a drink right there. I have no idea if you could picture this bathroom, but anyway I hope you did. It's like one of the bathrooms you can see in magazines or Lifestyle Network or MTV Cribs. Haha.

Sleeping in that room wasn't really the best experience. There were bugs and insects everywhere!!! We slept at around 12am already because we watched When Incubus Attacks Vol.2. So I was really sleepy but I swear...I couldn't sleep. Tita Vicky (Ida's Mom) told us to wake up at around 7am. But amazingly, I wake up after a couple of hours and I see that there were still stars in the sky and insects kept me rolling in the bed despite my effort of keeping still. I mean..I've covered myself with my blanket but for some strange reason those insects got through. Then I woke up again, and I was shocked to hear Ida laughing in her sleep. Hehe. That was new. And then I looked at the sky, there were only a few stars. I was dying for the sun to rise! I didn't want to sleep anymore! But I fell asleep again. And after a few minutes, or maybe an hour later, birds started to chirp, and there was this really annoying parrot somehwere in the frikking island and it was talking to frikking loud! I didn't even understand what it was saying which later I found out knew the words: panget and puke and knows how to whistle the intro of Happy Birthday. Gawwwddd...it was soo annoying. Boats started to pass by and I heard the noises. So the whole island was coming to life and I was out of gas. Really ironic. I felt kind of sleepy already that time but I can't sleep with all the noise. It was one cold morning so I got up from bed and wore my jacket, went back to bed and looked at the whole scenery. But I got tired of it I guess so I went back to bed but I didn't close my eyes yet. I looked at my friends who were sleeping and I'm just amazed. How the hell were they able to sleep under that condition?! Then Abby woke up. At last!!! Someone was awake! And then we started to talk and after a few minutes, everyone woke up. It was not even 7am yet. So we looked around the place. There were eagles, kangaroos, hedgehogs, some exotic birds, sugar glider, owls, snakes, horses, donkey and the huge dogs of course.

Tita Vicky said we had to transfer to another cottage because the owner's son will be arriving so on with some 30+ friends. Okay. I really wanted the whole island by ourselves but what can I do? And besides..I might meet some new friends or something. Haha.. Ida told me the owner's kid was cute and he was 22, and he's form I.S. Haha. Well the first activity for that day was to move to the other cottage which unfortunately was at the back of the island. Well at least, it kind of seemed like we had the place all to ourselves, right? But the life of the place just wasn't there. We had to walk like a few hundred meters to get to the gazebo. But it was okay. Anyway, we had the breakfast in the dining room, not the gazebo. We met the Mr. Peter Wallace, the Economist. There were these huge wooden masks around, well it was so huge you can't really wear it..I mean they're like masks with really colorful faces which seemed to have come from Bali but it wasn't. It was custom made in Paete or something. Really nice. Extending the dining room was the living room, which extends to the veranda. So from there, you'd see the amazing view of the lake. And from the veranda, you'd see the speedboat and the kayaks. So that was the our main activity for the day! Kayaks! That's like the only water sport I know. (Well I've been dying to go surfing but no one will come with me..and I don't have money...hehe). So we did. When we were in the shore pushing the kayaks to the lake, the dogs just kept on following us! And they were all big and I just couldn't handle them. And they were barking! Hayy...so I tried my best to get away but I was so shocked to see they were swimming and following us. But when we reached a couple of meters from the island, they swam back to shore. Amazing those dogs, really. They probably thought we're gonna drown or something. So we got there, we were rowing rowing rowing. Marga and Abby had the tandem Kayak. Me and Ida were on solo. We planned to tour the whole place but this dog I think Hummer..followed us! I have no idea how he got there but he was there! Oh and I forgot to tell you about Tita Bing. Tita Vicky's friend who were with us. She was still eating breakfast when we've gone kayaking but she caught up with us and she told us that the dog was following us and we had to get it back to the island! Grrr...and Ida was having trouble with her kayak so she and Marga switched. It was kind of difficult for us to get the dog back to the island because it was tired of swimming already, and we were tired of rowing. So we agreed that Ida and Abby would just bring it back to shore and me, Marga and Tita Bing would just wait for them in the small island in the middle of the lake, right across the Wallace island. We got off our kayaks and started to swim. Marga and I were just dying to swim. And surprisingly, the lake isn't the best place to swim since unlike the beach, instead of sand, there's mud. And the mud was just...nasty! I swear! So we didn't want to stay sit in the mud, we'd go to the place where the water's really deep so we won't feel the mud. Ick!!! We all thought we could swim to the Wallace Island but it was too far and Tita Bing told us that unlike sea water, fresh water makes you heavier. So if tried to swim, it will just make us really really tired. So we just stayed there in the middle of the lake..floating with our life vests. Ida and Abby finally came and we stayed there in the middle of the lake for about an hour talking about stuff. Tita Bing just talked all day about her son. Haha. It was really funny. It was like she was trying to set one of us up with her son. Well, basing from her stories, it was like her son was a Mama's Boy, really intelligent, who hangs out with other intelligent Math fanatics. He is of the same age with us, studies in La Salle taking up an Engineering course, a consistent Dean's Lister, first honor in fact and is now in the States by himself travelling. Haha.. good way of building up her son. She also kept on saying that one day, she'll have to like arrange us and her son with his friends some kind of outing. Haha. Yeah right.
We went sun bathing afterwards. Haha. So just imagine how dark I am now. But Tita Bing complimented me soooo many times that I got tired of it. She kept saying how beautiful my color is blah blah blah. I knew I was too dark already but I wanted bikini lines. Hehe..but I didn't get that. I had the new swimsuit and I still had tanlines from Bohol..so it was uneven. Not very nice. Hehe. So I gave up. Abby didn't! She wanted those tanlines so bad..and so did Tita Bing..so we stayed for a few more minutes. Boats were passing by and I just can't believe how Filipinos can behave like animals who just got out from the zoo. They were talking so loud about us and hello?! We could hear it! They were like so amazed that we were in bikinis or something. Jeez. Well anyway, we went back to th Wallace Island (btw, that's not the name of the island..haha). We stayed in the veranda. There was a huge table, about knee-high, with chairs in it. Of course, our favorite thing to do...we took pictures of oursleves. Abby had her kikay kit with her so we fixed ourselves first. Haha. Ida said we had to look cute so when Struan and his friends come, we're all pretty. Haha. But we took so many pictures of ourselves! We're just so vain. Uncle Peter could see us actually from his study but what the hell. Hehe. It was fun. It was around 11am and the sun was up in the sky. Abby wanted to sun bathe again so she did. After like 20 minutes burning under the sun, she got what she wanted. She had tanlines. Only that it was red and it looked like a lechon. Hahaha...and it hurt. Well...too much sun is really bad for the skin.

It was around 12pm and there was still no food. Ida said that the lunch will be at around 3pm. Geez. We were so hungry. We've played cards already and we ran out of thing to do. Tita Vicky invited us to go to the other island which they were preparing for the summer camp. So we rode the boat and went to the island. The cottages were still under construction but it was a nice place. Perfect for a children's camp. Very nice. And by the time we got back, Struan and his friends were there. They were playing hiphop crap. I just do not appreciate hiphop. The first person I saw was this guy who looked very much like Borgy Manotoc. Well I don't really find him cute...I just like his body. Anyway, we got back just in time for the 3pm lunch. Thank goodness for that! Oh and true enough that guy was Borgy. I sat down in the table and I was facing my friends who were facing the people. For some reason I don't like doing that. It's just so obvious that they were looking at them, right? And I didn't want to look at them. I mean...they should look at us! Haha. Well anyway, I could hear Borgy talking and I guess he was sitting exactly the way I was seated. He was facing his friends. And yes he was. Haha. Too bad for my friends, I guess they were just staring at his back. Haha.

So when we finished lunch, we continued our game, Bridge. I was teamed with Marga. Abby and Ida were teamed together. We were winning actually. Hehe. We cheated actually like, twice. But of course they didn't know that. I was the one shuffling the cards so when Ida and Abby went to look for Stussy, it was the perfect timing for me to do it. Haha. It was hilarious. They don't know it until now. After that, we went kayaking again. This time, we went on both tandem kayaks. Same teams. We raced to the island in the middle of the lake. When we got there, 2 girls went there too. Then Borgy followed. The other girl said to me that the mud was just yucky blah blah..so I told her to just walk further. The feeling is...liberating. Haha. It is really. I swear. It's soft and just disgusting. Hehe. So anyway, they left. We parked our kayaks and we went to the middle of the lake again, just chilling out, with our life vests on our legs. We kind of thought that maybe they made fun of us because we had life vests with us, because they didn't use them when they were kayaking. And then there's this guy who was with the group and his kayak just turned over. And he didn't have any life vest with him. It was really funny. Haha. Abby and I were just looking at him and making fun of him. Abby said something like "Haha! Parang gusto ko sha batuhan ng life vest! Kase and feeling!" And I think she kinda said it a little loud and we were all "Shhhh!!!" I mean we could hear them talking from the veranda, they could surely hear us. So this guy tried to get back to his kayak. I guess his ego was just wayyyy down because he didn't even have the gutts to go to the island where our kayaks were and from there get on to his. Well after a few minutes of struggling, he was able to get back to his kayak again which unfortunately turned upside down...again. Haha. Really funny. But he got back eventually and his friends clapped. That was a good show. Haha... So we stayed there and waited for the sunset. Ida kept on telling us how beautiful the sunsets there were. And when the sun began to set, we went back to our kayaks. And when the sun finally set, we went back to the Wallace island.

Dinner was to be served at around 9pm. Wow. Well it was okay. We took a bath and we were just tired. Abby got sunburned and it was really bad. It was really red. While waiting for dinner, we fell asleep. And then Tita Vicky got a call and dinner was ready. We went to the gazebo for dinner and we ate dinner. We were just tired and I guess Struan and his friends were too. There were a few people there eating dinner but people started to come. I was just happy that there was Swiss Chocolate Cake from Becky's for dessert. One of my favorites. Then Abby and Ida wen to look for Stussy again. So I went to sit beside Marga, facing the people...and I saw this group talking, but I really didn't care what they were talking about. Although! I got conscious because they were looking at me! I have no idea what they're talking about I didn't hear them but they were looking at me..or Marga..but I was pretty sure they were looking at me and they were like smiling and giggling or something. I dunno. I didn't even see their faces (I'm near sighted..). Now I'll forever be thinking what they were saying about me. I hate it. Good thing Tita Bing said we had to go back to the cottage.

Back in the cottage, we just brushed our teeth and went straight to bed...whappak!!!