Farewell 2006!!!

This has been a good year for me. It started off good and I'm happy it shall end on a high note.

I accomplished a lot of things this year, I think. I'm looking at my Multiply site and there were really a lot of good times:

1. Sige Productions started 2006 with a gig. It was one weird gig because Rico Puno's homies packed the house and me, along with the bands who played were taken off guard. (Salamin and Severo played that night...I think this was the first time I met those bands).

2. February was a fun month. For the first time ever in my 20 years and 11 months of my life, I went out on a date with myself for Valentine's. Haha! I was actually gonna meet with the New World Hotel person to settle the reservation for Green Evolution and I was in Makati really early. I was there at lunch time, so I took that time to treat myself to Haiku. Haha! But after that, I went back to school and hung out with my girlfriends. We called ourselves, "Lonely Hearts No More.," and we spent that time singing mushy songs in the amphi. Also in February, I went to Bangkok. It's always good to travel. I went shopping and I'm actually wearing my favorite jeans and my custom-made Chucks I bought there.

3. March, of course was my birthday. We went to Antonio's to celebrate but 3 days after, March 4, was my first big event: Green Evolution. Pulling off this event was really stressful, but it was well worth all that pain and tears. I'm really thankful to the Green Evo team and to JEMA for making that event successful. Another 4 days after was Therine's birthday, March 8. We haven't seen her for a long time and I guess we did something right this year that she invited us to her birthday dinner. I missed Teng a lot. And then on March 31, 2006, it was my Lola's birthday. I had an invite to partee but I guess due to circumstance I had to pass, which was goo because I stayed clean all year this year. I realized, with PTF, who needs drugs? We're always high.

4. April... HAHAHAHA!!! I really have to give props to Jan on this one. My first advertisement, which btw, should have only been a print ad, not a TV ad... dang! I invited my girlfriends to attend the launch of Freshcapades (which is my favorite toothpaste, seriously...all three flavors are good...and we just ran out..enge pa Jan!). This was just the start of my showbiz career, actually. Because a few days after, we went to Palawan and the Sarmiento Family + Tricia - Ate Erin appeared inn Living Asia. Hahahahaha! Our Palawan adventure, I gotta say was the best trip I had this year.

5. Merry month of May. This was a milestone for me! I had my first sleepover at Abby's house!!! She had her birthday party. I met a couple of her friends and we got drunk. We spent the whole night singing. It was already 3am and Abby and Ida and I were still singing, it was funny. This month, we had our batch reunion. Well with this one, I'm not really very happy with this. I just won't talk about why. I'm happy though, because I saw my batchmates and the iv2 girls I've been missing for a long, long time. What else...Ohh yeah. Eona's first photo exhibit! Another PTF happening. Zaza, Ikay and I hosted her party. We all looked lovely that night, especially Eona, who, I am very glad had the chance to show off her talent. I'm so proud of her. It's also this month when I got my iBook!!! Haha. Finally, I've my own laptop and I could do whatever I want, like blog at this time and post all the pictures I want. Haha! What else...Oh yeah..Therine's despidida. I cried when I left her party. I mean, eventhough we're not as close as we used to, I really loved her. It's just sad though that she doesn't write to me (and to the other girls). I sent her a few YM's but she never replied. Howell. Towards the end of this month, I started my OJT.

6. June. Nako po!!! This is the start of the dark ages for this year. OJT/Thesis term was such a drag but I had my boys: Adrian, Rocky and Pats so it wasn't that bad. We had a lot of good times, too. We met our boss, Marianne who became a really, really good friend. In the office, when we're doing our paper, she would invite us to join her for lunch, which was really cool because she knew all the good places to eat in Makati. For a few days, I actually knew how it felt to be working in an office. Haha! We weren't really busy at this time because we were just starting so I had the chance to go out with my bum friends: Ida and Marga. Occasionally, Abby would join us, but then she had med school so for the rest of the year since after med school started, it was always the three of us. This was also the start of my Grey's Anatomy addiction. When me and the boys were bored, we'd watch Grey's Anatomy. This was the time I started to dream of McDreamy!!! Oh yeah..I still had the time to go out with my blockmates. We threw Ted, Rina, Jenx and Dianne a party in Corik's. Sige Prod was still kinda active this month. My showbiz career was also still active this month. Haha! There was a second Freshcapades launch.

7. When July came, my promising showbiz career ended. It was time for me to take my OJT/Thesis seriously. Haha! We still had that Grey's Anatomy marathons, but I think it was July, when I almost lost my mind. We were always in Rocky's dorm doing the paper. I would leave his dorm, with ME smelling like his dorm. It was weird. I was always on the verge of shouting at all of them, but thank goodness, those boys were really funny and patient. Being the only girl in the group, I had the upper hand, and they knew how I was. I was a bitch and I really showed them how bitch I can be. Haha. But at the end of the day, we know it's all for our paper and we're all cool about it. We laugh at ourselves, the next day. It was also in July when the PTF saw each other every week. We were all practicing for Lolo and Lola's Golden Anniversary. We started to hate and love Benjie for that ridiculous voicing in Seasons of Love. Haha!

8. August came, finally. This was a really hectic month for me. Finished my thesis and then defended it. My thesis was a really big disappointment but at the same time a huge relief. When the deadline came, I really didn't care anymore about the grade. I was just tired and I wanted it to be over. It's amazing though that when the panel told us we passed, I literally cried. it was embarrassing, but whatever. I felt so happy because for the first time ever in my life, I didn't worry about anything. I remember the ride home. I was alone in the car and I didn't have a care in the world. A few hours after, however, I felt bad because our grade was really...well... bad! But thank goodness for PTF! Tito Emi and Family and Tita Babet and Estefano came to the Philippines for Lolo and Lola's Golden Anniversary. Great timing, really to take my mind off everything. We practiced for a week because the anniv was just one week away. We saw each other and our practices were really, really fun. It all became even better when we went to Villasis. PTF bonding to the max. It was just lovely. When we got back in Manila, another PTF happening because Sharkee's condo was blessed and the PTF had a party. Angelo introduced card games: Speed and ERS (and we know what ERS stands for, right? It's the EDEL R. SARMIENTO game, Angelo already left and no one beat me). It was such a PTF-filled month. I missed those days.

9. September was when the PTF US division left, but before they did, we made sure we had one last PTF happening. We went to Westgrove for a day filled with sports. Haha. I had a blast that day. Too bad that the US division had to leave. Ohwell. It was the end of the PTF happenings for a while. This was when I started my bum life. No more guests to entertain, no more school stuff...so I bummed, and bummed, and bummed. I enjoyed it, actually. It was good to be worry-free 24/7. I knew I wouldn't have as much time in my hands in the future, so I took advantage of it. Once in a while, I'd go to Marga's and Ida would also be there and we would just hang. This was the time when my parents started to notice whatta useless piece of shit I was beginning to be and it pissed the hell out of me, too. Haha. The beginning of my rants. But thank goodness for Ther. She had a party in Temple and all the girls were there. This was a good month for that party because this was the term my college friends would be busy with their own thesis/ojt and since then, I haven't seen most of them. Oh yeah..the three bums (Ida, Marga and me), went to Camp Cali to help out with the teambuilding of UST students. It was fun because I got to meet new people and I was out of the house, out of my parents' sight and I earned a couple of bucks for 3 days of fun and vacation. I scarred my leg though. Ida and I wanted to do the "cannon ball" dive when my leg just dug a hole on the frikking pontoon.

10. October was my graduation month. Yey!!! A lot of things happen during this month, but I'm too embarrassed to tell them. Only my barkada knows what my drama was. It's pathetic, really. Hahaha!!! So anyway, for our graduation gifts (Zaza and I graduated the same month), we went to Hong Kong!!! Shopping galore!!! When we got home, Zaza and I bummed for days. I started to submit resumes online. The three bums started to "look" for jobs together. I'm beginning to hate my parents more and more for nagging me about everything. I started to get bored so I stepped back on the treadmill and did pilates again, to no avail. I was just sooo damn bored. I began feeling empty inside + my parents were really irritating.

11. November. Threw Mom her Golden party here at home. It involved blood and sweat, literally. But it was okay. She didn't appreciate it though, but it's okay. November had to be my lowest point this year. There were a lot of rants and "Why God?!" moments and I think I've a couple of blog entries to solidify this claim. Haha. But I didn't want to just let everything fall down so I started playing tennis again and learned golf. I now love those two sports and thanks to them, I'm in a pretty good shape, physically now. Zaza, in a way saved me (HANEP!!!) in this month. She got me to attend her cell thingies. But seriously though, that night when I agreed to go with her, I just wanted to get out of the house and I was curious. She told me she wanted to set me up her cell leader (HAHAHAH!). And that night just did it for me. I got a couple of things out to a group of people who I think (hope) won't judge me for whatever I shared (well, except of course my sister who probably didn't know what was happening to me). So it was a good thing that that wasn't the first and last cell night I attended. In a way, it brought me closer to Zaza. There are still a couple of things I need to fix within myself (like that prayer thingie..I haven't been praying since I can't remember).

12. December was the turn around month. I think it will always be because of Christmas. I mean, with all the anger and hate I felt for the last couple of months, I can't possibly stay that way in December!!! Parties came, all the food came...everything just came together, I think. I have to say, my cell leader, David (who btw, didn't develop to a crush..haha!), said a couple of things to me and I thought about it. He gave me great advice, and although I still don't agree with everything he says, it made me think really hard. Plus, that one service Zaza and I attended really had an impact. They sang Hark the Herald Angels Sing and that's when I really felt that Christmas was around. That night, I came home really, really excited about Christmas. It was weird, really. Haven't been excited about something for a long time. For this month, I've also had a lot of realizations. I am really content with myself and I'm just happy! My old friends still love me, I met new friends and I have a great family. Full of drama, yes..but everyone has their own dramas, right?

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Good bye 2006. There were bad times, but now that I recalled what happened each month this year, I realized, there were more good times.

I'm glad I've had such a good year and next year will be even better. I can feel it! Yeahhh!!!!

22:51pm... I can see and hear our neighbors playing with their fireworks. For the first time, ever. We won't be having any of those. My mom says, she won't be burning money anymore. So maybe on 2007, there will be a lot of changes... Well..the good thing about the future is, we dunno what's gonna happen. Good and bad things will happen. There'll be laughter and tears, but what the hell...BRING IT ON!!!

Zaza's surprise shibang

Okay..none of my scheming worked. I found it really lame. Thanks to the spoilers who texted Zaza they can't go to her party. Mygolay. It's funny, really. I knew she knows about the whole thing and the spoilers just made it worse. Haha!!! Howell...these things really happen. The good thing is, there was a lot of booze and when there's booze, people fly to their happy places. I think everyone last night, at some point have gone to a happy place. It's just weird that Zaza's happy place included a lot of tears and drama. Howell! But in the end, it doesn't matter because we all had fun.

PTF represent!!! Kenneth and Jong were just waiting to get wasted last night. Mah brother, for once joined the party and drank with us. Ikay! She didn't get drunk, which was weird, but as she claims, she was naturally high. ErJan made booze, as usual. They even had a concert and held on to the magic mic for an hour. Imagine Jong and Ikay singing Total Eclipse of the Heart...CHAMPION!

The Del Prados are crazy / beautiful people and I love them already. Camwhores just click, ya know?

My crazy sub-barkada!!! Haha! Ahluvit ahluvit!!! You girls came! Another memorable night!!! Ahluvya girls. The pics are already in Multiply. We're such camwhores, I have a separate album for us. Haha!

I'm just glad Zaza had a "grool" time. She wanted a house party and she got it. And she got it good. It was her first house party na talagang wasakan and for the first time in the history of house parties here in 515 Batulao, my Dad got sooo pissed. Haha! It's all good. My parents won't let Zaza forget last night for a long time.

Haha... okay..I'll post my favorite pictures last night. Har!

My sneaky sister!!!

Just when I thought she was out of the house, I call Kassy to see how she's doing (she's baking muffins for tonight) and then I go down to the kitchen to check on the Jagermeister I placed in the freezer. Out of nowhere, Zaza appears and claims she forgot something. YEAH RIGHT!!! You were trying to catch me! I've made up so many stories already, mhen! I mean, this was your idea...a surprise birthday party for yourself. I just changed the date, para naman may element of surprise diba. But nooooo... Hayyyy!!!!

You are sooooo aware we're having this surprise party and I tried to cover it up! You better act surprised when you get here!

Stories I made up so that she won't think there's any party tonight:

1. I'm going to Embassy with Cez, Nina, Tal and Shi. Truth is, they are coming over for the party. I've missed them and I thought, why not invite them!!! So anyway, I told Zaza we were going to Embassy and I needed the car to get there, so she has to be home by 9.

2. XVD will have a party here at the house. It's slightly true. My Dad invited them over for their meeting. I thought he wasn't president anymore?!?!?! Howell. Mom said they'd stay in the den for the entire duration of their meeting. We had to go to the grocery to shop for the barbecue Ate Nita would be cooking....and the booze we'll be drinking. I bought mostly hard ones: Tequila, Tequila Rose, Jagermeister and 2 Large Red Horse. Gabby volunteered to bring so many things: beer, pizza and some appetizer with cheese. Haha. Anyway, thanks to Kassy and Gabby for doing what they're doing. I shall get you drunk tonight for all your efforts. :)

Hhmmm... I think I shall turn the tables around... what if she comes home and there are no guests?! I'll tell her we tried to surprise her but none of her friends showed up... HMMMMM?!?!?!?!?! It sounds really good and evil. Mwahahahahahaha!!! Wait..I might make her cry... Hahaha!

I think I shall scheme something...

I Shall Linger On My Singularity.

Today, I was so bored, I sang for around 2 hours with our magic sing. I dunno if our neighbors heard me but if they did, I feel so sorry for them. Haha.

I just watched A Lot Like Love. One of my favoritest movies ever. It's shallow and it's sweet, plus Ashton Kutcher is really cute. Amanda Peet is funny. I like their chemistry. This Christmas thing is really getting me ah. I feel bubbly and happy. And for the past weeks, kinikilig ako. There's no guy, nothing! For the first time in a really long time actually, I've no crush, prospect or whatever. I'm not even worried about it and I love it. I just feel this kilig thing for a reason I dunno why and thinking about it makes me feel even better. Haha! Weird noh, but ahluvit.

Hah! Another entry about guys? Tsss... Truth is, I'm done with them (as if I even started?!). My point is I won't stress myself about my "singularity." Maybe I'm happier now because I'm okay with it. And although I didn't get anything from my Christmas Wishlist (!!!), this year, I didn't ask Santa to give me a boyfriend. Haha! Yeah...every year for the past 3 years, I think I've wished for a boyfriend. Looking back, it's just pathetic. It's soo pathetic it's funny.

A few days before New Year... I'm kinda excited for the New Year. I think this year, I've been dwelling too much on the negative stuff. Next year, I will be happier. I just know it. It will be a good year ahead. Just thinking about it again, makes my heart beat faster. Haha! Hmm...I think I shall make a list of New Year's Resolutions right here, right now...

1. I will smile more.
2. I will keep a planner. (It's amazing how Zaza can check her planner last year and then she tells me what we did a year ago.)
3. I will flirt more. No, wait...when there's "more" it means I actually flirt, but I don't...so: I WILL FLIRT!
4. I will keep playing golf and tennis. (I think this has helped me keep my cool..hussaaaa!)
5. I will take more pictures. (this is for me to remember all the good times I will have.)
6. I will remember people's names. (I'm really bad at remembering names!!!)
7. I will give people gifts on special occasions. (Maybe even a letter will do just fine. Haha! I'm still kuripot!)
8. I will be less masungit...now this.. I dunno if I can do. I mean.. I think I'm no THAT bad..but whatever.. I shall try.

I dunno what else to put. I haven't been making New Year's Resolutions for years..since high school I think...and I dunno why I'm making a list! I don't promise to do all of them but I shall TRY. Haha!

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I've a really strong feeling my parents read my blog, it's creepy. They're not supposed to know the stuff I type in here. I'm fine with strangers reading my blog, just not my parents. My Dad made a speech during the Sarmiento Party and I swear... I think he read my rants. All of it. It's scary.

I love the holidays 2

The Sarmiento's are such camwhores!!! Haha! We had our Christmas Party I'd like to call JINGLE BELL ROCK. Show your inner rock star. Haha! Ahluvit!!!

I've new solo pictures...sarap talaga maging rock star!!!

I styled my Mom! Hahah! Ang cute!

Happy Holidays!!!

I love the holidays

From Bubba Gump to Embassy and then Saguijo the following night.

I love my girlfriends as always.

I love house music and dancing but I still love indie rock. I'm at home either way.

I'm getting to know Zaza's friends, for a change. (At least unlike before, they don't think I'm scary. Stil masungit though...but what the hell!)

Check out my Slide Show!

I am a "hottie." HAHAHA!

I feel like a kid again. For some reason, I'm really enjoying the holidays even if I'm just at home. The thought of Christmas is making me feel giddy and enthusiastic. Haven't felt this in years. I dunno why, but who cares why? It feels good! It's funny because with this state I'm in, I laugh at everything including these thoughts:

1. I may actually be an old maid. I'm almost 22, never been in love/relationship and I might grow old and be Ninang Edel who will give all the cool and expensive gifts to her godchildren. A sibling might even take me in their home because they're sorry I'm alone in the world.

2. I won't be receiving gifts this Christmas. I'm already a graduate and everyone expects me to have a job right now. And in my family, when you've reached this point, YOU should be giving out presents. Thing is, I've no money and so I didn't get anyone anything. Haha!!! I'ma give out all the love I have to offer. Now that's priceless!

3. No one texts me anymore. My joke textmates have stopped altogether! It's pathetic really. When I wake up in the morning, I check my cellphone and nada. I get invites to parties and that's it. No one wants to know how I'm doing. I get texts only from my parents with messages like: Where are you? It's late. Go home. Or from my girlfriends who expect me to plan our holiday dinners/parties.

4. I can stay in my room forever. With my laptop and the internet, who needs to go out? I chat with my friends, watch movies, listen to music, read the news, solve puzzles, every-thang! I have my pilates mat here so I can work out here, too. Haha! I can call the cook to bring up the food...but of course I don't. Pathetic, eh?

Haha. I'll probably cry over these things on a more appropriate time. Maybe Valentine's. It's Christmas!!! Time to spread the Christmas cheer!!!
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LAGUNA BEACH ALERT: this is gonna be sooo shallow and you may think I'm just sooo full of myself. I you don't wanna know... STOP RIGHT HERE! See ya!

Someboday made my day today!!! I was chatting with James as usual, and for some reason he made a comment about my "eternal beauty," which I thought was really funny. We joke around all the time so I thought he was making fun of me, as always. And then and he shared his first memory of me. (Hihi! It makes me smile just thinking about it!) We attended the same English class. It was our first day. He was sitting with his blockmates when I entered the room. I don't remember exactly how he said it but it seems as if they all just stared at me as I walk into the classroom and thought I was really pretty. 3 of his guy blockmates had a crush on me. Haha!!! James' term was "hottie."

Somebody thinks I'm a hottie. No make that a group of boys think I am. (YEAH!) This is really funny, noh? I've never considered myself to be a "hottie." I've never even have a group of guys drooling over me. Wait.. 'drooling' is really pushing it. Haha! Sorry if I'm making such a big deal. My entire life, only 2 guys have told me I'm beautiful (relatives and friends of parents don't count...they're biased!), and they weren't suitors or anything. They are friends. Former classmates who thought I was pretty the first time they saw me. What's really cool about it is that it was sweet and sincere.

ENOUGH before this gets into my head. Oh wait.. it already has. Haha!

Christmas is making me fat.

Seriously. Last week, I lost 2 pounds, not a big deal but hey that's 2 pounds. This sporty thing that I've been trying is actually working. I can see my flabs turn into abs. Haha! Just for the record, I'm actually pretty comfortable with my body. I've no intentions of having rock-hard abs because I've learned to love my "bilbils." Haha. Let me put it this way, I don't mind having bilbils but I still wanna be able to wear my jeans without having muffin tops. Bibils are cute, I think. I mean, Janet Jackson's abs are gross.

All this working out may seem to be out of my vanity but there's a reason why I work our harder than anyone in my household.I just seriously want to be healthy. I know I don't eat right, but I'm trying..I really am. It's just that when I get asthma attacks, I can't help but imagine myself 10 or even 5 years from now. I've seen some of my relatives with asthma and it ain't good. That's why I sometimes force myself to jog for an hour. But damn it! Christmas is making me fat. The days are colder and all I wanna do stay under my comforter and sleep. I stepped on the scale and I gained back the 2 pounds. I think it's because of the weekend I just had. Lotsa parties, lotsa food to eat. Plus, the BEST UBE IN THE WORLD is driving me nuts and the cookies my sisters are baking. It's me, who stole the cookie from the cookie jar...arggghhh! I actually feel heavier and I'm in that holiday mood already. All I wanna do is sleep and eat. Plus it's that time of month, ya know and it's giving me cramps. It's the perfect excuse for me to eat all I want and skip all these sporty stuff. Lucky for me, I've never really lost or gained a lot of weight. I'm constantly between 110-112lbs. (Except when I went to the US, where I gained 6 pounds. I was heaviest at 117lbs).

Hayyyy....wimmin and their weight issues!!! I think this is partly because my parents always tell me how fat I'm getting or how big my thighs are. Oh please. I'm NOT fat. I may not have the best legs in the world but at least I can wear my short shorts and still look decent. And the good thing is: I'm not underweight and I'm not overweight either. I've no eating disorder of some kind that a lot of girls are suffering from because of the pressures of life.

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I enjoy reading blogs. I like to know how people think, what matters to them and how they see their everyday experiences. I even read blogs of people I don't know. It amazes me how people can be so the same and so different. Most of all, it's cool that there are so many talented writers out there! I sometimes wish I could write half as good.

Anyway, a friend just told me about this blog: http://postsecret.blogspot.com/

Basically, people just mail in their secrets and the owner publishes the best ones on his/her site. Pretty cool!

This one's funny:


Seriously! Hahaha! Well..okay.. maybe I am privileged and SOMETIMES shallow...but definitely not stupid. Hahaha!

Christmas Parties here I come!!!

I love going to parties. I enjoy watching people so during parties, I get to see happy people and when I see happy people, I get happy myself. That's how your spread Christmas joy, I guess. I'm really loving Christmas songs too. My favorite has got to be: Hark the Herald Angels Sing of Take 6. It's the only time of year I get to really appreciate acapellas and I think this is the only time of year people should be singing in acapella.. it's soo Christmasy!!!

Friday, I went to Dad's company Christmas party. I don't think I ever missed it. It's one of the parties I really look forward to going because it's fun and really entertaining. It's very different this year, though. For the past years, each department would have a production and the VIP's (that's us and the wives of the top executives) will get to judge the performance. Usually we get sick of hearing that one song because it was such a big hit that everyone thought it was a good idea to use it in their performance (Sex Bomb, Ocho-Ocho, Mr. Suave, etc.). This year, I thought I'd hear Boom Tarat Tarat. There were no production numbers this year though. My Dad said everyone was too busy. This year, they had singing contests, parlor games and dance numbers. It was still entertaining and I think the employees still really enjoyed the party because there were so many raffle prizes. Almost everyone won something. The highlight of the night was when Mr. Raeuber announced the P5,000 bonus everyone would be getting this Christmas.

Oh and Tita Janet, my dad's assistant was given a loyalty award for 15 years!!!

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Yesterday, we went to the Letran Christmas Party. This get-together just started last year for some reason when my parents and their college friends decided it was about time for their families to get to know each other. It was fun, last year but it was better this year. The kids already know each other and we weren't shy anymore. We're all about the same age and together, we laughed at our drunk fathers who kept singing old songs in the magic mic, played games each family sponsored and posed for pictures, stole the magic mic from our dads and sang our hearts out. It was cool how the kids just got along almost immediately. I mean, last year was the first time for us to meet each other and last night, was only our second get together. It's literally been a year before we saw each other again but it's like we knew each other for a long time.

Hayy good times.

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Next week is another week of parties. Woohoo!!

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Dang it, we didn't have our camera..I've no pictures to post!!!

Christmas Wishlist.

I had a wishlist last year and I got none of it. So what the hell, I'll make one this year anyway. Someone with a good heart might read this and give me any of the stuff below. And in no particular order, here is my Christmas Wishlist!

1. Incubus' LIGHT GRENADES.
2. Keane's UNDER THE IRON SEA
3. New earphones for my iPod mini (my old ones are dirrrtttyyy).
4. At least a 50gb Maxtor external hard drive (there's so much good stuff in the internet I gotta download!)
5. Brandon Boyd's WHITE FLUFFY CLOUDS book (there's none here in the Phils. You gotta order it via whitefluffyclouds.com)...I've wanted to have this since around 2 years ago.
6. Nike Tennis Shoes (my old ones are getting tired already..they need to retire soon)
7. Adidas Climacool shirts (for all my tennis and golfing needs)
8. Roundtrip ticket to Greece
9. A really expensive pair of boots (I dunno why I want this..I just do)
10. The Killers' SAM'S TOWN

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There were times this week when I felt I was losing my Christmas spirit. Hello, I just got it a few days ago! In my pathetic attempt to keep it, I've burned the Christmas CD's in my laptop so I could listen to them all day while torturing myself with the Sudoku (Ida's crazy about it). But nothing beats a Christmas party to get it back. Last night was our block party here at the house. I'm so happy to see my blockmates!!! I haven't seen them in ages! I won't miss college, but I'll miss those people and our craziness. Hayyy... I love my blockmates. This year, I banned video cameras. There's no way they'll tape me crying and hugging everyone because I was too drunk. Haha. Good times.

Survey time...

Out of 125 Crazy Things, how many have u done?

Level 1
[x] smoked a cigarette
[ ] done weed
[x] kissed a member of the same sex
[x] drank alcohol
SO FAR: 3

Level 2
[ ] been in love
[x] shoplifted
[ ] been fired
[x] been in a fist fight
SO FAR: 5

Level 3
[x] snuck out of a parent's house
[x] had feelings for someone who didn't have them back
[ ] been arrested
[ ] made out with a stranger
[ ] gone out on a blind date
SO FAR: 7

Level 4
[x] had a crush on an older person
[x] skipped school/class
[ ] slept with a co-worker
[x] seen someone/something die
SO FAR: 10



Level 5
[ ] had/have a crush on one of your FRIENDSTER friends
[ ] been to Paris
[ ] been to Spain
[x] been on a plane
[x] thrown up from drinking
SO FAR: 12

Level 6
[x] eaten Sushi
[ ] been snowboarding
[ ] met someone BECAUSE of friendster
[x] been mosh pitting
SO FAR: 14

Level 7
[ ] been in an abusive relationship
[x] taken pain killers
[x] love/like someone right now - i think
[x] laid on your back and watched cloud shapes go by
[ ] made a snow angel/ man
SO FAR: 17

Level 8
[ ] had a tea party
[x] flown a kite
[x] built a sand castle
[ ] gone puddle jumping
[x] played dress up
SO FAR: 20

Level 9
[ ] jumped into a pile of leaves
[ ] gone sledding
[x] cheated while playing a game
[x] been lonely
[x] fallen asleep at work/school
SO FAR: 23

Level 10
[ ] used a fake/someone else's ID *someone else's school ID
[x] watched the sun set
[x] felt an earthquake
[ ] killed a snake
SO FAR: 25

Level 11
[x] been tickled
[x] been robbed/vandalized
[ ] robbed someone
[x] been misunderstood
[ ] pet a reindeer
SO FAR: 28

Level 12
[x] won a contest
[ ] been suspended from school
[ ] had detention
[ ] been in a car/motorcycle accident
SO FAR: 29

Level 13
[ ] had/have braces - technically..i wasn't braces
[x] eaten a whole pint of ice cream in one night
[x] had deja vu
[x] danced in the moonlight
SO FAR: 32

Level 14
[x] hated the way you look
[ ] witnessed a crime
[ ] pole danced
[x] questioned your heart
[ ] been obsessed with post-it notes
SO FAR: 34

Level 15
[x] squished barefoot through the mud
[x] been lost
[x] been to the opposite side of the world
[x] swam in the ocean
[x] felt like you were dying
SO FAR: 39

Level 16
[x] cried yourself to sleep
[x] played cops and robbers
[ ] recently coloured with crayons/colored pencils/markers
[x] sang karaoke *videoke
[ ] paid for a meal with only coins
SO FAR: 42

Level 17
[x] done something you told yourself you wouldn't
[x] made prank phone calls
[ ] laughed until some kind of beverage came out of your nose
[ ] kissed in the rain
SO FAR: 44

Level 18
[x] written a letter to Santa Claus
[ ] been kissed under a mistletoe
[ ] watched the sun set with someone you care/cared about
[x] blown bubbles
[ ] made a bonfire on the beach
SO FAR: 46

Level 19
[x] crashed a party
[ ] have traveled more than 5 days with a car full of people
[x] gone roller skating/ blading
[x] had a wish come true
[ ] humped a monkey
SO FAR: 48

Level 20
[x] worn pearls
[ ] jumped off a bridge
[ ] screamed "penis" at a football game.
[ ] swimming with dolphins
SO FAR: 49

Level 21
[ ] got your tongue stuck to a pole/freezer/ice cube
[ ] kissed a fish
[x] worn the opposite sex's clothes
[x] Sat on a roof top
SO FAR: 51

Level 22
[x] screamed at the top of your lungs
[ ] can do a one-handed cartwheel
[x] talked on the phone for more than 6 hours
[x] stayed up all night
SO FAR: 54

Level 23
[ ] picked and ate an apple right off the tree
[x] climbed a tree
[x] had/been in a tree house
[x] are scared to watch scary movies alone --but i do it anyway
SO FAR: 57

Level 24
[x] believed in ghosts
[x] have/had more than 30 pairs of shoes
[ ] gone streaking
[ ] been in jail

TOTAL: 59

Dang..baduy! There are stuff there I want to do what I haven't done yet...hhmmm... But some of the stuff here aren't crazy..what's so crazy about going to Spain or Paris? Tss...

Another year ahead.. yeh behbeh!

__________________________

I should get a job really soon.. What's taking them so long to call?!

The toughie is also a softy

I really dunno why people think I'm a "toughie." My NFF's (a.k.a cellmates) are calling me "sungit." I know I am and people my entire life has referred me as that but c'mon...I'm not masungit all the time..okay maybe I am. Well everyone thinks that about me the first time. I haven't really warmed up to them yet. I'm still a little aloof around them. It's hard being part of a group whose members have known each other their entire lives. There are memories and experiences you can never relate to. (I have that set of friends, too). Ohwell, I'm happy I have these NFF's. It's good for me. I'm getting positive vibes from them and maybe they're just getting my sungit vibes and all the negativity I am overflowing with. Haha!

Speaking of that toughie and softy thing... I took this test... and the results are...soo me. Or so Aids says so. Haha!













______________________

I'm feeling Christmas now. Christmas is in the air. YEY!

Not feeling Christmas

I'm feeling more like Halloween. I'm even listening to Manhattan Transfer's Twilight Zone. Once again, it could just be me or there's something wrong with this year's Christmas. For instance, it's really hot. One thing that gets me in that Christmasy mood is the cold weather. I like wearing my jackets and sweaters during December. I don't even have my comforter in my bed and every single night, I have to turn on the ceiling fan, a separate electric fan and the aircon to get a good night's sleep.

Another thing: everyday, I feel like moving out of the house. I can't seem to stand my parents. It's toxic being around them, really. It's Saturday. Give me a break. They catch me lying down on their bed, watching TV. They just came home from shopping. My precious siblings are somewhhere "working," and again, I'm the lazy kid who stays at home all day and does nothing.

(By the way, I played the labandera today. Our labandera got kicked out because of claims she has rabies, so Mom ordered ME to do the dirty job of washing our underwear. How low could that get? Well, maybe this is the life I should be living. I'm no entrepreneur so I do the laundry. Maybe next week, they'll kick out Ate Merlyn and pay me to clean the house. I mean, Dad's just asked me last week: What would I do if I'm a maid and my employer won't let me have day-offs. Hint hint!).

Dinner comes and my sisters just got home and they're off to their biznez, while I enjoy 2 servings of the pork afritada. My Dad, for the nth time, discusses about his favorite topic (in case you still dunno by now, it's business). For the duration of his heartwarming story of father and son entrepreneurs, I never make eye contact. I don't wanna get too involved. I might start talking business and God knows, I know nothing about it. So as I finish my mais con hielo, I head sraight to the TV room and do nothing. As I enjoy watching Mr. and Mrs. Smith while comfortably seated in the Lazyboy, my dad emerges from his room and was shocked to see me.

"Andito pala si Edel. Nandito pala si Edel eh... Kuha mo nga kame ng Mommy mo ng 2 baso ng tubig. Ok?"

Of course, being a lazy bitch that I am, I got pissed. (It's already starting, isn't it? They're gonna make me the new mayor doma of this house!) I went down anyway and got them their water, wondering why they won't turn on their refrigerator so that they won't have to come down everytime they're thirsty. That's the primary purpose of the ref in their room, right?

__________________________________

There's just so much bullshit coming out of me, noh? I'm tired of typing all these bitching. It's December, for crying out loud!!! I should force myself to embrace the Christmas spirit that this house is just so full of. (There I go again with the sarcasm!!! All this sarcasm is sucking the life out of me, not that there's really much of it left.)

Maybe I should start praying? Everyone's told me to pray for some reason. Oh yeah it was December 8 yesterday. So should I? Why? Just because it's almost Christmas? Hhmmm... Seriously though, things are starting to look up. Has somebody been praying for me? I asked Zach a few days ago: Is it okay to ask people to pray for me even if I don't pray myself? Maybe some people have been praying for me. Or maybe I'm just lucky. No. I believe the right word is blessed.

__________________________________

I changed the look of my blog. It's still boring. I dunno how to make it exciting. I read John Mayer's blog, he said blog without pictures is boring. I haven't been posting pictures lately. Then again, all I've been posting here are my rants. Haha!

I've been receiving good news. I hope (and pray?) that these blessings continue. Who knows? I might post pictures again of my happy times.

SHUT UP and LISTEN, kid!

I am beginning to believe that parents, intentional or not, fuck their kids' life one way or another. Seriously. I'm not complaining about my parents. They're just like that and I've learned to accept it. Maybe "fuck" is not the right term, but it's all I could think of right now. Maybe "mess up" is also appropriate.

As David said (ohmygod..I can't believe I'm even quoting the cell leader!), "Parents do that with the best of intentions." I know, I know they do.

I can't count the times my Dad told me my thighs were big, or when my Mom said to me that life is not a bed of roses. Recently, my Dad also told me I'm not an entrepreneur, or maybe I don't have what it takes to succeed. Imagine that. My Dad telling me I'm not good enough. Or maybe, that just shows how shallow my Dad knows me. Its hart ya know! But hey, I can't do anything about that. And personally? I'm immuned with it. We've had the conversation about them, being done with me. They've given me everything, educated me, the works and now, they're "done." Tsss... I'm pissed at him comparing me to my sisters and how "maybe" I don't have it in me to be entrepreneural and that "maybe" my heart really belongs to the arts.

Uhhh...that's 4 years too late, Dad. Like any of the hundred arguments I've had with you, I lost that one when I told you I wanted film instead of accounting. That's why I compromised. I'm now a fucking Marketing Management graduate. I've buried my immature dream of becoming a film maker a long time ago, thanks but no thanks. I've deliberately shut down that part of me. Sure, once in a while I think about it, I dream about it and I fantasize that I am going to be one of the greatest film makers, that's one of the things on my mind when I thought I was gonna die, but that's all there is to it. I dunno how to write a screenplay or how what the hell a 9mm is. I don't think I'll ever know and I've no intentions of learning. Not anymore.

Thank God I am good at my "chosen" field. I've learned to love it, despite what my accountant parents thought of it. And please, Marketing isn't just about fucking selling. I can sell anything if I want to, thank you very much. That's how good I am at it. But what the hell. There's no use of arguing anymore. They can think whatever they want to. I can't do anything about that. An explanation to them is just a waste of time. Contrary to THEIR belief, they don't listen. So why bother? I don't even want to start with that "you're not born to be an entrepreneur shit."

I wonder how the fuck I got into all the conerts I went to. I never asked for their money. I justs had the money. I wonder where it all came from. Let's see.. that's 2 P5,000 tickets for 2 F4 concerts, 1 P2,000 (front row, by the way) to the Incubus concert..oh and I loaned Kokoy another P2,000 for that, another P2,000 ticket to the Hoobastank concert and then I also went to the Linkin Park concert. That's another P2,000. That's a lot of money, if you ask me. Maybe I stole them. I mean, I can't possibly have gotten that money from my business! I am not entrepreneur. And besides... I don't think "big."

What else... Sige Prod? Ohh I don't think that as a business. I've had wayyyy too much fun with it. It was just a good excuse for me to party every Saturday night. I got all the support from my siblings, cousins, Tito's and Tita's, and friend. But not from my parents. Maybe it was just too "small" for them.

So yeah...maybe my heart really is in the arts. I can now study film if I want to. Nevermind. I'd just stick to this business thing. It seems to be the best thing for me. But it also seems that I don't have it in me. Now what?! Thanks for making everything so complicated. I'm fucked. It's not their fault because they just wanted the best for me. It's my fault that I am fucked.

I'm done talking to them. I'm tired of it. I talk to them when the conversations make sense: movies, golf, jokes. Other than that? I'm quiet. They told me all I do is talk. I'm an arrogant kid who doesn't listen to her parents. Now is the time for me to shut up and listen.

Hayy buhay nga naman.

I still can't believe that a friend of mine died this morning. He got into a car accident 2 nights ago and now he's gone. We took the same course in college, and he was the JEMA president 2 years ago. We weren't very close, but we knew each other well. He was also my ka-carpool so we really spent a lot of time together. He would sometimes pick me up at home and we would be talking non-stop (except for the morning shifts when I fell asleep). He was a very talkative guy and we never really ran out of things to talk about. He'd give me advice about the marketing subjects I was taking that he already took, he would share his rants and raves about his day, JEMA stuff, jokes.. He's intelligent and he's a nice guy. I'd see him serve at Church too. He was just that guy who was involved in everything. It's really just tragic that he would die in a tragic accident and at such a young age.

Maybe I'll see u in another life, Chris.
__________________________

The cell sessions are actually helpful. I still have my doubts. I still don't read the Bible and I haven't prayed yet. (Take note of the word "yet" at the end of my sentence. Does that word in the end mean I intend to do it in the future?). There's still angst in me and sometimes I feel like it wil always be here. I'm getting tired of being mad, actually. I'm beginning to be indifferent and indifferent is the last thing I want to be.

"They say death kills you, but death doesn't kill you. Boredeom and indifference kill you."
-Iggy Pop